Puddles 02/11/2010
"What's going on behind those eyes of yours?"  I look all around me and my children are right beneath my feet in little puddles. It can be as simple as giving Max the wrong pastry, he gets red in the face and crocodile tears form and he begins to cry. (He does not like to cry and always tries holding it back). Sophie is having the greatest difficulty with this new life of ours. She cannot express it with her words but I can tell by her argumentative behavior. She is constantly fighting and disobeying me about everything under the sun. My patience is wearing thin. What happened to my (very irrational) and beautiful picture of my family? I have a tendency to not worry about "the uglies" in a situation until I am stuck right in the middle of them. I always hope for the best. Our kids have always rolled with our life and I assumed that they would do the same with this new life in Paris. I was so wrong. After a very long day of trying to either step over or mop up my little puddles that I call Max and Sophie, I was exhausted. I ended the day picking the wrong battle with my daughter. Why I insisted that she go pee before bed, I do not know? When I say, I insisted, I mean, I really did! Yelling at her, "now you get on that toilet and pee little girl!" "But Mom, I can't, I promise" said Sophie, looking up at me from the toilet. "You WILL go pee and I am going to stand here in this little closet of a room the French stick their toilets in and pee!". Dan heard all the commotion and came in. I looked at him and said "you deal with her." He, very calmy tried explaining that she had pee'd in her bed two times this week and she needed to go pee. "" But Dad ......." , Sophie said. "But Sophie ......." Dad said, (his voice getting louder). Shockingly, we were able to get the kids to bed and by this time Dan was looking at me like I was losing it. (Prior to the pee incident, Sophie was arguing with me about something and I literally said "Hey Sophie, watch me " and proceeded to put my hands over my ears singing" la la la la la la. "Real mature, I know. Not my proudest moment but the truth. We are in the middle of a major transition. My rose colored glasses are off and my prescription lenses are on. Is this what people were trying to tell me about before I left? This period of adjustment. It's not fun and the day after all the drama, I am spent. I am a bit scared of this daughter of mine who is incredibly stubborn and argumentative. I am already fearing her teen years. It is so hard to see the kids struggling. My heart physically aches for them. I know my Dad would tell me, "Kids are very resilient, they will be just fine." I know that kids are strong but that Mother in me, who has a perpetual guilt complex, worries that I am scarring them forever. Is this amazing dream of mine turning into a nightmare for my little darlings?  "Sophie, I think if we go that way, we will find our way back home to Texas" CommentsDebra P. Thu, 11 Feb 2010 08:17:43 Gina, I could really relate to this post although my children are 16, 12, & 9 . . .just different circumstances . . .buried under 70 inches of snow!(school is closed for 11 days!) Being out of our normal routine, picking at each other, and stuck in this situation we can't change. However, we will get plowed out just as all of you will adjust . . . I know how it hurts your heart as a mom to see them upset, but your Dad's words are right . . .as adults we have learned to cope, and as children they are learning to cope by your example . . . what a great example you both are! (By the way, I have actually done the la, la, la thing too!!! . . .I'm not proud of that one either). I'm getting through it by looking forward to SPRING! Soon, it will be here. Just think of all the great outdoor parks (Luxemburg Gardens!)around Paris you will be able to visit! Max & Sophie will grow to love this new place and will remember it always! Dad. Thu, 11 Feb 2010 11:11:51
Thu, 11 Feb 2010 15:11:57 Oh Gina, Laura Schmidt Thu, 11 Feb 2010 17:00:31 The dear girl is probably just adjusting to the time change. All will be well. Aunt Rita Thu, 11 Feb 2010 19:41:15 Gina honey, Dan (Gina's Husband) Johnson Fri, 12 Feb 2010 00:27:25 It probably comes as no surprise to anyone, but Gina is NOT giving herself credit for all that she has accomplished in this adventure. She is absolutely, without question, "The Woman of the Year" and "Super Woman" combined! Gina rarely gives herself the credit she is due. One day I read where Linda asked her "now, how are you doing?" and I encouraged Gina to be honest and discuss anything she might be struggling to overcome. Her comment to me, typical of Gina, was "Dan, I really am THAT happy and I cannot think of anything but the joy I am finding in this wonderful adventure we are enjoying as a family..." Need I say more? This "phase" will pass and Max and Sophie will be right back on track before the you can say "croissants mes enfants?" Love You Gina, DJ Sun, 14 Feb 2010 15:12:37 Gina, It sounds hard but will it reassure you that my own daughter threw major tantrums at age 6 when we moved to Columbus, and again at age 9 when we moved houses within Columbus. I found that when she was in this mood, I could threaten to take away everything that was dear to her and it didn't help her gain control. The only thing that would help was if I would stop all the things I was doing and hold her. She might resist at first, but eventually, we both calmed down. Now, my daughter is about 2nd or 3rd in line of people I can't wait to share my news with, after my husband and my best friend. She's a joy to be with and her teen years were much easier than those 6 and 9-12 years. Whenever you think you can't do it anymore, just sit down and hold them. auntie sally Mon, 15 Feb 2010 01:37:25 gosh i want to give you a very big hug and do in my prayers often. it's good to admit when you feel like you're getting to the end of your rope, occasionally act a little juvenile, maybe scream and cry a little. it's humbling to realize we are human and imperfect at that!! i know by the time you read this your munchkins will have probably had several more episodes of sun and rain because each day is a new beginning fresh with promise for your sweet family. hang in there toots and if you need more cheering up ask your mom about some of the melt downs we had as the kids were growing up, it would make you look like mother teresa! Leave a Reply |  AuthorGina Johnson  ArchivesAugust 2010 CategoriesAll |
A Year of Change
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